MyMaidens.com

My name is Greg Hoy. The gig here is to document things I've never heard people say or things I see I've never seen before. I call them "maidens". I doubt I'll ever be able to say "Now I've heard everything" or "I've seen it all", but this should help me keep track.

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Nov 21
This recently christened my ears:
“I have this thing with shippers - they don’t like to ship to me.” Robert Jolly said this to me moments ago. I can vouch for this statement, because I have to overhear him verbally berating customer service representatives on the phone. At the end of these calls, I feel like I have done something wrong.
Posted at 8:09am

Nov 17
I've never seen this. Never ever: They tell it like it is here in Philly. I was handed this after I got out of a cab that was indeed a minivan. They tell it like it is here in Philly. I was handed this after I got out of a cab that was indeed a minivan.
Posted at 10:16am

Nov 10

I don't need to sit down for a grilled cheese

Sean Alexander at Club 185 in Columbus when a hot greazy cheese- swirled sammich arrived and I was bogarting the open seat.
Posted at 9:10pm

Nov 9

I had to wear a rash guard because my nipples were getting chafed.

My college friend John talking about surfing in Hawaii. Truth Is, he surfs like a shipping palette.
Posted at 7:40pm

Nov 7
I've never seen this. Never ever: Not much I can say that isn’t obvious. Not much I can say that isn’t obvious.
Posted at 12:21pm

Nov 7
I've never seen this. Never ever: This is like a bun with no hot dog. This is like a bun with no hot dog.
Posted at 11:53am

Nov 7
This recently christened my ears:
“Get with it, beardy.” Jason Santa Maria just said this to me at the FOWD conference because I didn’t know ‘DDR’ was short for Dance Dance Revolution.
Posted at 8:17am

Nov 6
This recently christened my ears:
“I chased a cockroach into my toaster.” Via Jason Santa Maria, who instant messaged me that tidbit he heard Liz Danzico say. Apparently, a cockroach scampered for shelter in her toaster in a frantic attempt to escape certain death. The only thing that suffered that fate was the toaster, which was promptly discarded.
Posted at 1:54pm

Nov 6
This recently christened my ears:
“Pay no attention to the man near the brownie pan.” Rob Weychert, at work, whilst burgling the last brownie from the batch Jenn made.
Posted at 1:47pm

Nov 2
I've never seen this. Never ever: In London, at the Mayor’s Thames Festival in September. What the hell is the difference? They’re free because the US Dollar is poo? In London, at the Mayor’s Thames Festival in September. What the hell is the difference? They’re free because the US Dollar is poo?
Posted at 4:57pm